And then it was March (almost).

At risk of sounding like a broken record, I’ll go ahead and say it. I don’t know where the time goes.

I spent the entire day today on retreat in Galveston with one scrapbooking group of mamas. As I culled through a year’s worth of memories and put them in albums, I relived so many days we’ve spent with friends and family. That is why my work here is important. More time than I’d like passes between posts, but I do my best to record the big days and the little things here at the casa.

Since it’s been a while, I once again find myself tempted to attempt to recap e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g. BUT in keeping with my theme for the year of forward motion, I am going to spend less time dwelling in the past and do my best to sum it up fairly quickly. Here’s the highlights real. Then I’ll finish with current events.

Christmas came again. My personal favorite part was a relatively quiet Christmas morning just the four of us. It was actually pretty noisy with the sound of new toys and squeals in the air but that’s the sound of Christmas. I venture G’s favorite part had to do with one Nerf Gun. A close second would be the whoopi cusion uncle Nathan brought. B’s favorite is a stuffed Mickey Mouse Santa brought. To this day, if you ask him where Mickey is, he will hold his hands up in wonder and go walking around to find him.

January brought good news. Nennie and Grandaddy are moving to Houston. Grandaddy is already here working and Nennie will follow when Aunt Alyssa heads to college in the fall. We’re so excited and looking forward to much more time together. We celebrated Deeda’s birthday with a memorable meal at Hearsay Gastro Pub. The mac n’ cheese took mac n’ cheese to new heights. I wrote down the cheeses included. The Jalepeno cocktail was also delish and Deeda was beside himself to find his favorite, Tres Generations.

This January we also tackled a project I set out to do last January-update our master bedroom. Thanks to Nana’s savvy shopping skills and design ideas we have a whole new look and we didn’t even break the bank. It was a bargain bonanza! Let’s just say $7.95 curtain panels.

February is our third and running birthday month at our house. Unfortunately, we started it out with a case of the flu that took out the entire Pre-K at G’s school. I may not have known this had I not called most of the class to reschedule his birthday party. Ultimately, we had one heckuva Jedi Training Star Wars party. Deeda did a bang up job developing Jedi lessons and making a movie with our family in the staring rolls of a funny Star Wars remake. Many points for Master Deeda. Props to G-man too for trying his very best to rally on the day his party would have been. It was heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time.

While we’re on Star Wars, I also have to mention my post over at the Communications Plus blog. Once again, Volkswagon spoke to me. I’d swear directly. I seem to have always fallen into their target market.

I can’t let February’s recap go by without mentioning the viral rash/hives that took over Barrett’s body and changed shape daily for four days before disappearing as if nothing ever happened. Let’s just say, when I first saw him, I was woozy as if I might pass out. Best thing I can say about that long week is that while G recovered from the flu and got legal to go back to school, and B endured the rash in good spirits, we had a few days of togetherness we wouldn’t have had otherwise. In the midst of it, the sickness thing is stressful. Not only do my babies not feel well, but I feel stressed by missing work. The balancing act just gets more complicated. But on the other side, when the dust settles for a minute, I almost always look at it as an opportunity I had to hug them tighter, spend more hours in the day together and all in all become more aware of how grateful we are for two children who spend the majority of their days healthy and happy.

And here we are. Almost March. The rodeo season is kicking off with the cook off. The CP gang and spouses attended last night along with special guests Grandaddy and Uncle John. Thanks to our wonderful hosts/friends from Busters BBQ in Lakeway, we had a boot scootin’ good time.

So that’s the recap. What about today? Today B is getting two more teeth. That must be close to a mouthful… He loves to snuggle with his brother. And G tolerates it with patience and tenderness. G is super engrossed in star wars Legos. We go next week to register him for Kindergarten.

Tonight I am missing my boys. It’s been a very busy week with events each of the last three nights and though this time with my memories and my friends is wonderful, It will be equally as god to get home and settle in for another week.

Signing off. Let’s hope posts in 2011 are more frequent than quarterly.

Fastest. Fall. Ever.

Nutshell version in the something is better than nothing category.

October 4: Return from five lovely days in Mexico with Deeda. Barrett is walking!
October 9: Quick beach trip with the neighborhood gang.

October 16: B’s Bday. One. What? When? How? Sniff. Sniff.
October 24: Dewberry Farms for Tal's bday.

October 31: Halloween. School festival. Park Parade. Trick or treating and chocolate eating.
November 4: Touchdown, Washington, D.C. Megan Slack’s Wedding, Brunch with the Butera clan, a lot of walking, a cucumber mojito (or two) and one tired mama.
November 9: Livingston for the day. No rest for the weary.
November 10: Texas Conference for Women rocked and inspired.
November 12: Boulder bound. Buffs win. Party Party with old pals. There was a mechanical bull. There was a marvelous brunch.
November 20: Deeda goes to College Station. Aggies beat Nebraska. Record crowd!
November 24: Road Trip! Turkey Day in Dallas. Aggies win.
December 1: What month is it? Weren’t we on a beach in Playa a minute ago?
December 4: Tamale day. It’s official. The holiday season is here.
December 5: Santa came to the Sasser’s Christmas party. It's really official now.

Whew! It's been a whirlwind, but the best kind. We are so blessed with family and friends and our world revolved around both this fall.

In other news, today Barrett said "Bye-Bye" and blew a kiss for the first time. I melted.
He also says uh-oh, Mama, and all done.

G is beginning to read and loving his field trips. Today they went to see a Christmas play! He’s grown a full inch since mid-October and often just says for no reason at all, “Mom (0r dad), I love you.”

One.

Yesterday we celebrated B’s first birthday! At 10:33 a.m. I was rocking him for a nap. I noted the time, squeezed him tight and exhaled.

Something about one year birthdays are big to me. I remember feeling the exact same way at G’s first birthday. I felt like celebrating. I felt like I needed to take a deep breath.

I feel like I have been holding my breath a lot. Especially in the first few months. The fragile early, early days… The days that run together. When I try to think of those days now, I remember two days in particular. One day I consciously decided to do nothing but hold B and watch movies all day. We watched “Marley and Me.” The other stand out day was the day it snowed big huge flakes. The rest just runs together…

And then all of the sudden three months had gone by and it’s time to go back to “normal” life. And by the time everyone adjusts to the heartache of daycare drop offs and the daily schedule, six months has gone by. Total blur. That’s about the time I came to and get in enough of a rhythm to start trying to take in every little milestone. Next thing you know baby is mobile and everyone is just trying to keep up.

Add to the mix of life an especially crazy few months at the office, a shoulder surgery for deeda, and a much needed vacation for deeda and mama, and poof! Here we are. One year old! “And you may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?...Letting the days go by…."

As if at the moment he turned one he wouldn’t be a baby anymore, I spent a lot of time in the last weeks holding him closer and rocking him for longer than usual. And then the day came. And it went. On the flip side of the big birthday, I feel relief. He’s still a baby (for a little while longer, at least).

Friends and family joined us for a beautiful day. We had pumpkin cupcakes. Carmel apple dip. Popcorn. Bags of juice, wine and beer. We took the afternoon into evening with good friends. G may have had more fun than anyone... He got to open presents and have all his friends over.

As I get used to the idea of B being one. I get excited about what’s next. His personality is starting to show. Verbal communication is on the horizon! Formula’s days are numbered. When I think about it that way, I don’t know why I have this urge to cling to the babyhood. It‘s hard work! And they aren’t lying when they say it just gets better. Every year that has passed since G turned one has been more fun than the last.

I guess the clinging is just that they generally let you hold them and cuddle them at this age. And they smell so darn good. Boys don’t smell good the more they grow… pretty soon we’ll be one of those families that has to buy three gallons of milk at a time and we’ll have odor eaters on a regular rotation. I just flashed forward to imagine B at 10 and G at 13…

While we wait for the next milestones to arrive, here’s what I know about B at one year.

• The Bear is a lover. A real cuddle-bear. Has been from the get go.


• He is Zen-like easy going unless he’s hungry, tired or you need him to be still.


• He eats like a champ and likes almost everything he’s tried. However, it’s important to know he has an affinity to fruit and starches. If you offer him either of these first, all bets are off for whatever else is on the plate.


• He doesn’t do scheduled naps, but he does sleep like a champ. He’s slept consistently all night since about three months...


• He would climb the Empire State Building without hesitation, but he’s tentative about taking more than 4 or 5 steps at a time. Maybe it’s the feet. If he were a puppy I’d predict Great Dane at full size.


• He wants to walk all the time but since he thinks he needs a hand, he recruits whoever he can to tour with him around the house. He had Pops, Papa Mark and Uncle John on rotation yesterday.


• He wakes up happy and sings to himself while he patiently awaits the arrival of a groggy parent in his doorway. And when we arrive, his little head pops up and he breaks a smile you can barely see from behind the paci, but can completely see in his eyes.


• When he says mama, I melt. He also says all done, yeah and a-da (which is code for dada).


• He will tell you how it is if you had him a telephone. He gets the device is for talking.


• He loves his brother and any attention he gives him. G’s fake whistle is a particular crack up.


• He usually waves with both hands. He doesn’t wave on command as much as when he feels like it. He particularly feels like waving while riding in his new blue car.


• When he smiles he wrinkles his nose and puts his teeth together like a professional. He loves to see the camera come out and is usually good for a few smiles before he resorts to trying to get a hold of the camera.


• When he’s happiest, he laughs a noise that sounds something like a cold car starting. Eaaaaaaack! Eaaaaaack! Eaaaaaaack!
  
  

Couldn't leave off without a photo of G. He's a wonderfully giving brother. He was kind enough to open all of B's presents for him... in addition to giving his brother his own beloved "BC" blanket and pillow. All on his own he initiated this thoughtful gift of his own secuirty blanket and offered it the very first thing on the morning of B's birthday. He has the biggest heart!

Freeze Frame

A snapshot of our life: This evening there was some confusion between the words piñata and piano at our house. For a few minutes there, G had us all completely confused. He knew he had it wrong but every time he opened his mouth to say piano, piñata came out. We all laughed and he finally got it right…

Got to cherish those moments. The look on G’s face as he sounded out the word syllable for syllable, the prideful giggle that followed and the exchange of a glance between me and Deeda. The little things that prove G is still a little kid. The reminders are few and further between.

He just looks more mature in the face. He wears fancy tennis shoes and has favorite T-shirts he knows are cool. He sings Cheeseburger in Paradise and names the Foo Fighters as his favorite band. When Deeda carries him to the bathroom to brush teeth (a ritual 'round here) he looks long and his feet look huge. He is long. His feet are huge. Size 11.5 (and I have a size 12 in waiting). Other than the occasional vocab slip up or teary tired moment, the kid has really grown in the last few months. He’s writing his name, sounding letters and doing simple math at school. I think about where he was at the time of B’s birth and it seems like he’s come nearly as far as the little one. Leaps and bounds.

Of course, I feel like I could literally see B grow if I looked closely. It’s insane. At bedtime these days, we say “night-night.” He waves! And we go rock. We moved the rocker into his room about when he stopped falling asleep in the middle of whatever chaos was going on in the living room. Still the easiest child to put to bed, he’s typically asleep before I can sing a single round of Twinkle Twinkle. Rocking him to sleep is a pure joy and every night I hold him for a while as he sleeps so I can appreciate his babyhood. It’s the kind of moment I know I have to soak up. It’s the kind of moment that, tonight at 7:42, inspired me to get this entire thought process on paper.
Here we are and already B is ten months and a few days. It’s time to order birthday invitations. He’s been on the outside longer than it took to “grow him.” These are the last couple of months we count in measures of months... Sippy cups are in play. Bottles are less frequent… Crawling is turbo-charged and standing and stepping from one piece of furniture to another close by is a favorite game along with Peek-a-boo.

Tonight as we rocked I was thinking about how these are the best months of babyhood. There’s a routine in our life that’s in greater than three hour increments. Plus, he’s got all kinds of interactive tricks that are very entertaining. Most importantly, he’s still a baby by most accounts. He still feels like a baby, with his head in the corner of my arm, even if his feet are sticking out from under the other arm a quarter of a mile…He still looks like a baby in his footy PJ’s with his paci. He still sounds like a baby when he cries to be picked up or because I took my phone out of his hand… And he still smells like a baby just after bath and when he spits up all over his shirt each and EVERY morning when we put him in the car seat to go to school (there’s a magic button or something).

It’s in these months, the second time around (and almost certainly the last time for us) that I feel like I fully realize and appreciate the importance of soaking up the baby things before they completely disappear. And it’s this feeling—that can feel like sadness from time to time—that turns into the most genuine gratitude I have ever felt. All is right in the world for a few minutes while we rock. It’s this feeling—that can feel like sadness from time to time—that has me living more in the moment than I have since I was a child myself.

Ask my other half, I have been guilty on many occasions of making myself miserable by trying to look waaaaay down the road. I’ve wanted a detailed photo of what the future looked like. I wanted promises and guarantees. I didn’t realize it before now, but as a mom, I’ve flip-flopped. In fact, I’ve nearly neglected the future. Since G was born, I’ve been so focused on right now I haven’t looked down the road much… too busy to think beyond right this minute. This weekend. This month. Unless you’re trying to plan something with us, in which case as much advanced warning as possible is critical to getting on the agenda. We’ve got a lot of obligations you know. Always something…

I am in the process of balancing the future with the now. Living in the now—which is more than getting through the day. Planning for tomorrow, while appreciating tonight. Both are important. The kids grow up… all too soon, the kids grow up… When it comes to aging, the future always seems to arrive quickly. The future is all on the brain these days. It’s unclear in a lot of respects. I am thinking about how I want five years from now to look. 10 years from now. 20. In a good way, not the paralyzing way of the past.

In the mean time, I know this for sure: these days of being the parents of young children are a short time in our life. In reality it’s just a few years. I want to make the very most of them. So, that when we look back, it feels like longer than it was. It feels like longer than it was because there are so many wonderful memories made in this time—the short time is so rich.

I can draw a parallel to college. It was only four years (thank you very much), but so much happened during that time—it was such a great time—that when I look back it seems like a majority of my life's memory. In actuality, it was just a small fraction. And real quick, while on that topic, I’ll just add how excited I am about the plans in the works for the fall. Boulder, here we come.

We celebrated my uncle Steve’s 70th birthday over the weekend. A friend of his he’s known since he was 7 or 8 years old attended the gathering. That’s so cool. I hope my oldest friends make it to my 70th. I feel certain for Steve and his childhood friend David, “life moved pretty fast” (I loosely quote Ferris Bueller). Happy Birthday Steve!

At the same party, I visited with a friend and her 18 year old son. I remember when he was probably 5 or 6. Basically G’s age. How did he get to be 18? So. Fast. It was a couple days after the party that I saw a photo of the same mother and son on Facebook and it brought me to tears. I am certain it seems like yesterday that she sent him off to Kindergarten. I see in his face the little boy he was… but it’s just barely there. I see in her eyes the pride in what he’s become…Freaks me out. Here’s why…

On Monday we marked the first day of school and the first annual Boo Hoo Breakfast for my neighborhood circle of moms. It was an occasion worthy of a vacation day in the name of fun, total relaxation and distraction for a mama worried about her baby on his first day. I was happy to support my dear friend (with mimosas) when she returned from walking her little boy to the school around the corner for Kindergarten. I remember being 23 thinking my coworker was crazy when she showed up teary on the first day of school. I had no idea. But now. Now! I know that this school year will fly by and in the blink of an eye it will be my turn to take my first BABY to school. And about a minute after that, it will be Baby B’s turn… Make it stop. Just for a minute. Freeze the frame.


Remember this scene from Big? I couldn't find the whole thing... but this gives you the idea. It does seem like they grow up overnight sometimes.

sassy supersicle

There sure have been some good stories since the last post.

Like the Father's Day when G was so tired he fell asleep about 6:30 p.m. and when we woke him up to go to bed and Deeda shuffled him to the bathroom to potty, G literally pottied on Deeda, at which time Deeda's Father's Day celebration was truly complete.

Like G's first sleep over with Tal where I noticed the two of them playing like real friends do. Not playing side by side but feeding off each other... taking one another's imaginary world and making it their own...building a story together. Taking turns. It really was something to see. A major milestone as far as I am concerned.

Like B's first words... Da! Da! and every now and then you'd swear he spits out a sentence... in between motor boating. He loves to motor boat.

Just in the last week, at nine months on the dot, B has started with major protests when we take something from him or when he doesn't get what he wants. waaaaaaaaaaaaaah. It's new enough that it still makes me laugh...but before long we'll have to figure out how to take care of that.

Last week G wanted to wear his "Clark Kent" clothes, as in a button down shirt and clip on tie, to school because his new girlfriend Andrea wants him to dress fancy. I asked him what happen to Isabelle (the ex) and he said he just can't decide... good!

The other day I picked G up from school. The class was on the playground and G was sitting to the side pouting. The teacher made it clear hew was beating himself up more than he really needed to... so I went over and asked what happened. He didn't look up. He mumbled, "I used my super powers on Taylor." Now, I am not going to tell the child he doesn't have super powers. I just reminded him to use them for good, not bad. No kicking allowed.

There is something blogworthy nearly every single day at our house. I love that. But I haven't been good about keeping up...

Time flies. And that's what inspired me to sit down and quick get at least something down tonight. Because this morning... just before 6 a.m., B was making noise in his bed and Deeda brought him to our bed where he cooed and snuggled in back to sleep. Just after 6, G came in, his feet flopping all the way... and he crawled in next to me laying as close as he could. Still, snuggly, and quiet. And we layed there. And I thought to myself: these days are numbered. It's just that at these ages, it works as part of our routine.

Now, there are a lot of mornings when the four of us in one bed isn't so sweet. G is kicking, B is pulling up and playing with the blinds, I just want a few more minutes of sleep... and then B spits up all over Deeda and pretty much from then, it's "everyone up." But this morning, it was wonderful. The four of us. Before the morning madness began...

Look at these cuties. B is 9 mos with 7 teeth. G is 4 and a half and he is totally into superheroes.